I was stunned when each of my children, on separate
pediatrician’s visits, ran from the doctor’s office without even glancing at
the sticker bucket. On many, many previous visits, choosing the perfect sticker
had been a 20 minute ordeal. Suddenly it seemed, the sticker stage was
over.
One of my favorite questions to ask groups of parents is to
share a recent family milestone. My sticker bucket story is the story I love to
tell. While I had anticipated many of our children’s milestones – the first
step, the move from crib to the big-boy bed, the first day of kindergarten, the
first drop-off playdate…there are even more that I didn’t anticipate. These are
milestone moments that surprised me: when my kids gave up on the sticker
bucket; when they first rode their bikes to the library without me; when they
joyfully jumped off the diving board, without drama, again and again; when our
cat no longer fled but let himself be petted by their small hands; when they
started to wake for school by the sound of the alarm clock.
In Parenting Through a Jewish Lens, we reflected on the life
course we anticipate for each of our children. We also reflected on what a
Jewish life course would include. This winter, my husband and I will take our
children to Israel
for the first time. This is a moment I have thought a lot about; I’ve been
anticipating this one for years. I want them to love Israel the way I do, to feel a
connection to the people and the place.
The traditional Jewish prayer, shehechiyanu,* acknowledges the passage of
time and expresses gratitude that we are alive to experience each new season
and new stage. Customarily, this particular blessing is said at the start of
each Jewish holiday, when tasting fruit for the first time in its season (like
strawberries in the summer), for wearing new shoes or clothing. I try to
remember to say a blessing as I enter each new stage of parenting; often I
enter those stages without even realizing it.
What’s the family milestone you’ve experienced most
recently? What is the blessing that you
would like to say?
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